repent like Saint Ephrem

 

Cheesefare Sunday and Forgiveness Vespers --- wishing all a holy beginning to Great Lent 2021

Brethren-  do this, understanding the present time: The hour has already come for you to wake up from your slumber, because our salvation is nearer now than when we first believed.  The night is nearly over; the day is almost here. 

So let us put aside the deeds of darkness and put on the armor of light.  Let us behave decently, as in the daytime, not in carousing and drunkenness, not in immorality and debauchery, not in dissension and jealousy.  Rather, clothe yourselves with the Lord Jesus Christ, and do not think about how to gratify the desires of the flesh.

Accept the one whose faith is weak, without quarreling over disputable matters.  One person’s faith allows them to eat anything, but another, whose faith is weak, eats only vegetables.  

The one who eats everything must not treat with contempt the one who does not, and the one who does not eat everything must not judge the one who does, for God has accepted them.  

Who are you to judge someone else’s servant? To their own master, servants stand or fall. And they will stand, for the Lord is able to make them stand. (Letter to Romans) 

For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you.  But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.

“When you fast, do not look somber as the hypocrites do, for they disfigure their faces to show others they are fasting. Truly I tell you, they have received their reward in full.  

But when you fast, put oil on your head and wash your face,  so that it will not be obvious to others that you are fasting, but only to your Father, who is unseen; and your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you.

“Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moths and vermin destroy, and where thieves break in and steal.  But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moths and vermin do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal.   For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also. (Gospel of Matthew) 

Pray with St Ephrem this Great Fast

O LORD, Master of my life, grant that I may not be infected with the spirit of slothfulness and inquisitiveness, with the spirit of ambition and vain talking.

Grant instead to me, your servant, the spirit of purity and of humility, the spirit of patience and neighborly love.

O Lord and King, grant me the grace of being aware of my sins and of not thinking evil of those of my brethren. For you are blessed, now and ever, and forever. Amen.

Lord Jesus Christ, King of Kings, You have power over life and death. You know what is secret and hidden, and neither our thoughts nor our feelings are concealed from You. Cure me of duplicity; I have done evil before You. Now my life declines from day to day and my sins increase.

O Lord, God of souls and bodies, You know the extreme frailty of my soul and my flesh. Grant me strength in my weakness, O Lord, and sustain me in my misery. Give me a grateful soul that I may never cease to recall Your benefits, O Lord most bountiful.

Be not mindful of my many sins, but forgive me all my misdeeds. O Lord, disdain not my prayer -the prayer of a wretched sinner; sustain me with Your grace until the end, that it may protect me as in the past. It is Your grace which has taught me wisdom; blessed are they who follow her ways, for they shall receive the crown of glory. In spite of my unworthiness, I praise You and I glorify You, O Lord, for Your mercy to me is without limit. You have been my help and my protection. May the name of Your majesty be praised forever. To you, our God, be glory. Amen.

how a combat medic uses the Jesus prayer to stay close to God in traumatic circumstances

"I thought I would share some thoughts on the Jesus prayer as for many of us in the East it is the bedrock of our devotional lives. This is only how I use the devotion currently after nearly 20 years of trial and error. Not that there's a wrong way to say a prayer.

In the mornings as I'm waking up, I begin the regular beginnings from "Heavenly King" till the "Our Father" with the blessing of layman "through the prayers of our holy fathers, oh Lord Jesus Christ have mercy on us."

I'm a medic currently in a combat zone, so depending on the chaos level of the day, I grab a prayer rope and say the long form of the prayer "Lord Jesus Christ, the only Son of God, have mercy on me the sinner." For about ten breaths. Each breath is about six seconds in coupled with the prayer and six seconds out coupled with the prayer. So that's about twenty times saying the prayer in a "focused" manner. I was a volunteer in a PTSD clinic years ago and this is an adaptation of that. 

At this point someone is usually "encouraging" me to get breakfast before the cook throws it out. As I go through the day I'll continue to say the prayer. As I dress I put on my prayer rope. (I have one I keep on me everywhere that I don't get wet that was given to me by a local on the first day I responded to an incident where four women were kidnapped and two killed and two men killed by a group of terrorists in a supply raid. So I often walk around with one rope on each wrist.) Throughout the day I will see the prayer ropes and be reminded to pray.

At some point in the day, I'll either go for a walk or find a corner where I'll use the rope and "breath match prayers" for a full loop. My ropes are 200 knots so this takes some time, about 20 minutes. I'll then do a loop not worried about breathing. This is followed by "most holy Theotokos, strengthen my weakness" for a loop. At night I'll tie a few dozen knots as I say the prayer as well. Then some short prayers before bed.

The purpose of the breathing is to help with the regulation of the emotional sections of the brain. Further, this creates a psychological anchor similar to what a hypnotist would use. As something unpleasant comes up, a deep breath "starts the prayer" and serves to calm the mind and control the stress hormones including adrenaline. 

It's important to set this anchor free of "negative" emotions. Don't allow the brain to wander into things that anger or frustrate or depress. Nor is it a good idea to allow "positive thoughts" to interfere with the prayer. I'm looking for God not casting a spell. 

I hope this helps those of you coming from the West to understand why we in the East have so few other "short" devotions. This is really the bedrock of our personal devotions. Everything else takes time. Paraklesis, hours, psalms, gospel and epistle reading... The only other "short" devotion I have is Bible memory work, chip by chip memorizing the epistles and Gospels." 

Thank you,  "Iubitor al lui Dumnezeu, " for sharing this snapshot from your prayer life! 

I recommend the book below written by an anonymous believer who used the Jesus prayer to remain close to God 

Click here for a theological reflection on the Jesus prayer and is the Jesus prayer 'vain repetition?' 

Hail! Bread on which the princes feast: continuing Nativity Fast Akathist prayer

In Bathsheba’s son God wove wisdom from the strands of David’s sin. Now a new Solomon will lie before the Ark, no longer the Ark’s worshiper, but its Treasure and its Glory. Wisdom Himself comes to be born, woven not of tangled flesh but of Spirit and virgin awe, leading us to pray:
Hail! Before Whom David danced.
Hail! Cause of sweet-sung psalm.
Hail! Glory of the Temple.
Hail! Borne between the cherubim.
Hail! Wisdom foolish to the wise.
Hail! Kingship lowly to the lordly.
Hail! Bread on which the princes feast.
Hail! Cleansing Blood for priests.
Hail! Wealth beyond measure.
Hail! Wonder of the world.
Hail! For Whom prophets spoke.
Hail! To Whom kingly praise is due.
Hail! New Child, being God from all eternity.

Not now to heaven does a chariot bear Elijah;
but upon the earth the fiery Virgin journeys,
unconsumed, to Bethlehem.
The Spirit, no longer apportioned as once to Elisha,
is poured out without measure upon all who sing:
Alleluia!

Into evil have I been taken captive, banished by sin. My heart’s walls are broken down and my body’s temple lies ruined. Where is Zerubbabel, David’s son to obey the king’s decree? Where is priestly Ezra to sacrifice for mercy’s sake? Where is Nehemiah to mourn for me? He is here, emptied into flesh, self-exiled for love of the cast out who proclaim:
Hail! Yearned for by Babylon’s streams.
Hail! Comfort of the weeping.
Hail! Forsaken but never forsaking.
Hail! Faithful to a faithless people.
Hail! Nearby when we are far away.
Hail! Joy hidden within the ashes.
Hail! Secret food for those who fast.
Hail! Who hears the rending of the robe.
Hail! Strength of the remnant.
Hail! Hearth aflame for the returner.
Hail! Temple and temple-builder.
Hail! Restorer of the Law.
Hail! New Child, being God from all eternity.

Shall Judith now slay the tyrant death?
See she comes, beautiful of face, prudent of heart,
like Esther in majesty, steadfast like Ruth,
the Virgin widow whose sword is her own Son
who wields Himself for all who chant:
Alleluia!

don't let perfection be an enemy of the good: a day retreat with my daughter

I'd love to be able to take my children on frequent overnight retreats. It just does not happen. We are too busy, and so are my teens. We, my oldest and I, decided to spend a full Sunday together in prayer after our Saturday late evening vigil at our Byzantine Catholic mission. We started with a reflection on gratitude given by our family priest- husband and father. Then, we were off an hour away to visit a Melkite Catholic church we had never seen before.

We appreciated the beautiful mosaic-style icons that covered all the walls. We stayed for the Divine Liturgy, but left early to get to a Ruthenian Catholic church to go to confession- the only sacrament that we cannot get from priest-father! 

We were blessed to go to confession and then stayed for the Divine Liturgy with our Romanian Byzantine Catholic community. 

(this photo is from a previous Sunday with our Romanian Catholic community)

We ended our day with a rosary at the San Fernando Mission. It was a beautiful experience seeing the diversity of the Catholic Church this past Sunday. Now, we need to find the Syrians, Copts, Armenians, and Chaldeans! My oldest is a senior in high school. She was accepted to her first choice of university on October 1st. It is time to be more intentional with spending time with my two teens before they fly the nest!

to the new priest's wife, wondering & worrying about the future

This comment was recently sent to me: 

I have been a priest’s wife for just under two days. Please pray for me. I have no idea what the future has in store for us!!

Please pray for this new priest, priest's wife, and any children they have!

Bless this marriage and his priestly ordination and grant unto these Your servants  a peaceful life, length of days, chastity, love for one another in a bond of peace, offspring long‑lived, fair fame by reason of their children, and a crown of glory that does not fade away.

Account them worthy to see their children's children. Keep their wedlock safe against every hostile scheme; give them of the dew from the Heavens above, and of the fatness of the earth. Fill their houses with bountiful food, and with every good thing, that they may have to give to them that are in need, bestowing also on them that are here assembled with us all their supplications that are unto salvation.

For You are a God of mercy and of compassion, and to You do we send up Glory: as to Your eternal Father and Your All‑Holy, Good, and Life‑creating Spirit, both now and ever, and to the ages of ages. Amen

heaven touches earth: The Byzantine Catholic Divine Liturgy

just say Jesus- like the Coptic martyrs

Milad Makeen Zaky--- Abanub Ayad Atiya--- Maged Solaiman Shehata--- Yusuf Shukry Yunan--- Kirollos Shokry Fawzy--- Bishoy Astafanus Kamel--- Somaily Astafanus Kamel--- Malak Ibrahim Sinweet--- Tawadros Yusuf Tawadros--- Girgis Milad Sinweet--- Mina Fayez Aziz--- Hany Abdelmesih Salib--- Bishoy Adel Khalaf--- Samuel Alham Wilson--- Worker from Awr village--- Ezat Bishri Naseef--- Loqa Nagaty--- Gaber Munir Adly--- Esam Badir Samir--- Malak Farag Abram--- Sameh Salah Faruq source: Taylor Marshall Blog

 Just thinking about them today...

an inspiring contemporary Christian song for Catholics: For King&Country's Proof of Your Love

Yes, dear reader, I have to stifle a cringe when the song leader wants us to turn to page 123 and sing Gather Us In or Lord of the Dance at Mass. Why are we stuck in 1982? Church started years before that- none of the older music is worthwhile to remember? 

In the church, awaiting the holy sacrifice, we should be reverent, solemn.If we truly believe what the priest is going to do, there is not a place for 1982-style strange theology. But there is a place for praise. 

The Byzantine style is traditional, and we frown on innovation because innovation sometimes can lead to theological missteps like Gather Us In. We will sing the old songs over and over. Anything new is probably really an old song that the cantor recently discovered while attending a service in the old country. I prefer it this way within the church, but we might be making a mistake in that we are throwing the baby out with the bath water.

In a Byzantine service, we would never sing the song above, but we can learn from their fervor and the beautiful theology in the words. Listening to songs like these- and also more traditional audio like listening to the rosary or chant- help me get through another long drive in traffic. This song could be a great way to inspire a prayer time. We traditional, liturgical types can sometimes forget that there really is a place for a more charismatic communication with God even if we are not be this way during a religious service in church. 

This song convicts me. Like we say before we receive the Eucharist at the Divine Liturgy- in my life, I am the "greatest sinner"- let my life not be a scandal and a stumbling block to those who are searching for God in His Church.

Proof of Your Love lyrics   

If I sing but don't have love, I waste my breath with every song
I bring an empty voice, a hollow noise
If I speak with the silver tongue and convince a crowd but don't have love
I leave a bitter taste with every word I say

So let my life be the proof of Your love
So let my love look like You and what Your made of
How You lived, how You died
Love is sacrifice
So let my life be the proof, The proof of Your love

If I give to a needy soul but don't have love then who is poor?
It seems all the poverty is found in me

When it's all said and done-- When we sing our final song
Only love remains-- Only love remains

If I can speak with human eloquence and angelic ecstasy
But don’t love, I’m nothing but the creaking of a rust gate
If I speak God’s word with power, revealing all of His mysteries
And making everything as plain as day
And if I have faith to say to a mountain jump and it jumps
But I don’t love, I’m nothing
If I give all I earn to the poor or even go to the stake to be burned as a martyr
But I don’t love, I’ve gotten nowhere
So, no matter what I say, no matter what I believe, no matter what I do
I’m bankrupt without love--- 1 Corinthians 13:1-3

a good book a day- 7 favorite spiritual books

1. Introduction to a Devout Life- by St Francis de Sales

  

2. On Marriage and Family Life- by St John Chrysostom

 

3. 101 Questions & Answers on Eastern Catholic Churches by Edward Faulk

4. When the Church was Young: Voices of the Church Fathers by Marcellino d'Ambrosio

5. The Joy in Living- Mother Theresa of Calcutta

6. The Sunday Sermons of the Church Fathers

7. The Tale of Three Trees by Angela Hunt

check out the post below for my little ones announcing the winner of the 'Angel in the Waters' book giveaway!

more quick takes at conversion diary

m-ai întrebat: Byzantines & 'offering it up'

A reader asks: "I liked the article you posted about offering things up.  I have never come across Eastern Catholic or Orthodox using that language. I understand the Roman teaching and have taught my children to think of Christ's suffering and unite their pain to His and pray for someone in need. Or I tell them to think of Christ's suffering and be grateful and bear things with patience. But I have avoided telling them to offer things up, I guess I always wondered how it fits in our Eastern spirituality. Can you help me out with this or point me to a similar Eastern thought or practice? Maybe it's been a silly thing for me to even with about?!"

I asked my husband for help on this one. I am always hesitant to make declarations of 'this is how 100% of Byzantine Catholics worship" because I am a mom not a theologian and historian & I am Romanian Byzantine Catholic. Much of which might be a forced 'Latinization' for a Slavic jurisdiction will be just a natural inclination towards the Latin because we are a Latin people. For example, in Romania, you will find the stations of the cross in an Orthodox church. 

In any case, there are many examples of Eastern Christians 'offering up' our sufferings as a sacrifice to God and an offering for the good of another soul. In the Divine Liturgy, the priest prays the 51st Psalm ("O Lord, open my lips, and my mouth will declare your praise. For you have no delight in sacrifice;if I were to give a burnt offering, you would not be pleased. The sacrifice acceptable to God is a broken spirit; a broken and contrite heart, O God, you will not despise") while incensing the church; the people are praying the great doxology. This means, for me, that their entire Divine Liturgy is an 'offering up.' 

Perhaps we should encourage and tell our children that prayerful behavior at the Liturgy is a sacrifice of a contrite heart to God. And as it is an Eastern practice to pray unceasingly (as with the 'Jesus Prayer'), doesn't it follow that we should try to extend what we do in the Divine Liturgy to our daily lives? If the priest- and the people- is offering a sacrifice in the Divine Liturgy, shouldn't we extend that sacrifice and 'offering up' during the rest of the day? 

During the Great Fast, we celebrate the Pre-sanctified Liturgy on weekdays. One of the most frequent responses is "Let my prayer rise like incense before you, and the lifting of my hands as an evening sacrifice." It is clear that we are 'offering up' our sacrifice to God. 

I think that our beautiful and reverent Liturgies can actually be detrimental to personal and family prayer. After a two hour Liturgy (maybe standing the entire time), a person might feel that they are 'done' for awhile. This might be why we Eastern Christians do not have a version of that blue Pieta prayer book. But we are not 'done.' 

We should learn our holy traditions and practice them as well as we can, but this should not stop us from personal devotions. We should not abandon liturgy-based prayers such as the Akathist to the Theotokos, but this does not mean that a rosary cannot be beneficial to us as well. We Eastern Christians have a different way of seeing things, but this does not mean that the other way is invalid. For unity to be a possibility, our traditions should be practiced by us Byzantines and respected by the West just as we should do the same for their traditions. 

There will be some 'cross-over' for both East and West. The Pre-sanctified Liturgy is a great example of this cross-over; a long, mystic, very Eastern Liturgy written by the future Pope of Rome, Gregory the Great. 

so dear reader, please continue 'offering up' your sacrifices to God- and keep my family and I in your prayers as you are in mine!

where I am from: a simple poem

a free write, inspired by The Reluctant Widow

I am from licorice toffees, violet mints, Turkish delight

I am from rallies against nuclear weapons, a prayer circle remembering John Lennon, a life chain.

I am from the aloe vera, the eucalyptus, the Scotch broom, the blackberry, the dogwood, the primrose,  the poppy, the palm

I am from reading the same book again and playing a play and giving to new immigrants from Howie, Howard and Hattie.

I am from loud singing and sitting in the front row.

From "it will be in the last place you look for it," "if you have nothing to do, don't do it here," and "offer it up."

I'm from California & England & Czech & Germany & Romania, enjoying tacos, trifles, cabbage, garlic, greens

I'm from the flute player, the advocate, the mother, the searcher, the sock-monkey-maker, the sometime quilter & crocheter, the sensitive extrovert, the Californian

I'm from the surfer, the warehouse man-turned historian, the activist, the father, the woodworker, the talkative introvert, the New Yorker

From the green jello salad with cottage cheese and grated carrots, the wheelchair, the smile, the singing voice

From the blackberry pie, from Little House (the book, not the series), from ragdolls made before cancer took her

From the Anglophile, from his movies that crop up on television in far places, dubbing him into Slovak 

From a Japanese garden, from the diabetes that limited him to one glass of wine, from his mild distaste of the Church and possible return

I am from the Quakers- singing "Animal Crackers," from the Episcopalians- not quite singing a solo in children's choir, from the Catholics- singing "On Eagle's Wings," then "Salve Regina," then "O, Maicuta Sfanta."

I am from heaven- as everyone is.

When Your Baby is in the NICU

Jen of Conversion Diary just had a baby, and he is hanging out in the NICU for awhile. My fourth baby stayed there for five weeks, so I have experience! Here are some random tips, Jen:

1- Remember that you are postpartum! It takes me a month to feel slightly normal...I know it is hard, but get some sleep and recover from your ordeal! Jen has a big family- call in favors and have someone watch the kids for two hours a day and then sleep.....also, expect to feel the typical weepiness- anything more, consult your doctor. Having a baby in the NICU makes things worse- anxiety is something to watch for as well as depression.

2- Get the phone number of the NICU and call twice a day to meet the nurse that is in charge of your baby for the next twelve hours. Find out when the nurses do 'rounds' and try to not call during this time. Normally, rounds are 6 to 7 or 7 to 8 (both am and pm). 

3- For babies that will be hanging out in the NICU for a long time, buy some cute onesies and leave them there. Normally nurses loves to dress the babies. If your baby is in the covered incubator and/or respirator, let the nurses dress him/her in hospital grade stuff. Our baby also had a doll in her bed- make sure it is washable and write your baby's name on it in Sharpie. Normally, they will give you the onesies and dolls to wash, but I didn't want to lose the doll.

4- Write down your baby's progress whether you are visiting or calling. This will reassure you when you wake up panicked in the middle of the night. For early babies, an important milestone is the baby's weight. Ask for the weight twice a day and write it down. You will not remember the last weight, so write it down! For other babies, you might be focused on bowel movements, oxygen levels and/or feeding. Write it down! Write down questions you have- you will forget when that doctor is in front of you (I know I did)

isn't she sweet?!

5- Make sure your baby is registered as a Catholic (if applicable, readers). If you are afraid for your baby's health, have the baby baptized and anointed. You can have the baptism party when baby comes home. Our baby was small (32 weeks, 4 pounds), but healthy. I was the sick one, so we felt confident in waiting for sacraments. We still had her identified as Catholic and had some holy cards taped to her bed. I liked that the nurses 'knew' her in that way.

6- Be kind to the nurses (cookies, brownies, flowers) but demand optimal care for your baby. Ask that the nurses write things down for you. If your baby has a bad day- maybe she lost weight or had an oxygen episode- have the doctor explain everything to you or your husband and write things down. If you are sick and your husband is taking care of 20 children during his paternity 'vacation,' maybe an aunt can be given permission to speak to nurses. 

7- Don't feel guilty like I did if your baby is doing well. Our baby was born in my husband's hospital. She was healthy- just small. She was fat compared to the other babies. So I didn't communicate as much as I should have. I didn't even know that there was a breast pump in the room where I could take the baby (who was on a feeding tube)...I was trying hard to be 'good' because it is my husband's hospital AND I have yelled at doctors before- supposedly I yelled at a doctor before my first daughter got her appendix out at four years of age. I don't remember this- but anxiety can get the better of us. It's a balance. 

8- Take advantage of any services the chaplains and social workers have to offer. Whenever a friend asks 'what can I do,' tell them to bring milk and paper plates or have their kids play in the back yard with your kids with their mom supervising and you sleeping...Never say no to a meal. Just because the baby is not with the family yet does not mean that you don't need help. It is a good idea to stockpile meals in the freezer, however. It will get crazy when baby comes home. 

9- Don't ignore your husband and your other children, but make them understand that the littlest is the big priority right now! And just because you don't have to wake up every hour to take care of the baby does not mean that you can run around like a crazy person! You are postpartum and have worries about the newest member of the family. Do your best to pump....not an easy task....and recover from pregnancy. Involve the other children in making preparations for the baby's homecoming. 

10- Consider having your husband split his time off from work- one week postpartum to help momma and one week when baby comes home so he can help with the adjustment. 

finally! 5 weeks later (not quite her due date)-home at 6.5 lbs

11- Don't forget to offer up your anxieties and frustrations for those who cannot have babies or who didn't get to take baby home....

St. Gerard, who, like the Savior, loved children so tenderly and by your prayers freed many from disease and even death, listen to us who are pleading for our sick child. We thank God for the great gift of our son (daughter) and ask him to restore our child to health if such be his holy will. This favor, we beg of you through your love for all children and mothers. Amen.

Readers- If you have experience with a child in the NICU- please add your wisdom in the comment box below! I'm sure I am missing a lot

Our Icon Corner- '31 days'- day 21

Someday I'll improve upon this photo- many of our icons haven't been hung up again because we recently re-painted the living room walls. In the meantime...the main icon is a reversed painted glass icon, typical in Romania.

Is the Jesus Prayer 'Vain Repetition?' -a guest post from Eastern Catholic Spiritual Renewal

At one point in my practice of our Byzantine traditions, I remember a question that someone asked. They wanted to know if our traditions concerning the Jesus Prayer went against the Lord's teachings. The teaching that they were speaking of are in the gospel of Matthew where the Lord says, "When you pray, don't babble on and on as people of other religions do. They think their prayers are answered merely by repeating their words again and again (6:7,NLT).The question that was asked was reasonable based on this passage but this teaching does not represent the way the Jesus Prayer is used in our tradition. What the Lord was addressing was abusive forms of prayer, which in this case meant people who were not addressing God in personal way.

There are various ways that our Byzantine spiritual fathers have taught us to pray the Jesus Prayer. Among the teachings of our fathers there is nothing close to what can be considered vain repetition. The fathers were always clear that the goal of prayer is a personal relationship. Anything short of this is vain. For example, Elder Sophrony on addressing centering prayer techniques said, "In diverting our mind from all images, meditation can afford us a sense of tranquility, of peace, release from time and space, but there is no feeling of standing before a personal God. It is not real prayer-face to Face.(On Prayer pg.139)." According to Elder Sophrony's teachings repetitive forms used in the Jesus prayer must oriented toward knowing and loving a personal God. We do not use them to enter states of mind or to somehow manipulate God. As the Elder said real prayer is "face to Face".

When oriented properly the repetition used in the Jesus Prayer helps a person grow in their personal relationship with God. However, it's important to understand why we use repetition in the first place. It's easy to understand why we do it but often we lack the knowledge associated with the tradition. First of all, we were created with the propose of loving God for all eternity. Every aspect of what we are was geared toward developing a personal relationship with God, which would include our mind and body. Next, because of sin there was a disorientation in how we were naturally geared toward God. Being obscured the body and the mind were no longer used for their original purpose. Third, in the work of Jesus Christ and his Church we find a way back to what we were originally created for. In the spirituality of the Church we discover various systems that help return the body and mind to their original purpose. In conclusion, There are many forms of discipline in the Church that we use to struggle against are sinful condition. The use a repetition in the Jesus Prayer is way to recondition the body and mind to their original use. 

Repetition used in praying the Jesus Prayer has taken on many forms in the history of the Byzantine tradition. Many of us know the popular usage that involves inhaling(Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God) and exhaling(Have mercy on me a sinner) a method that's often used in conjunction with a prayer rope. St. Nicodemos in his instructed went a little further with this method in his day. He instructed his followers to hold their breath and say the whole prayer in the mind and then exhale. A method that demonstrates well how the mind and the body are reconditioned back toward God. In this way the mind is disciplined to overcome its tendency to wander in prayer with the body's help. In all the forms that we can find in the history of the Byzantine tradition the goals are always the same, which are to return the body and the mind to the proper use.

There really is nothing vain about our use of repetition in our Byzantine tradition if we understand it. The use always involves personal salvation. One of our spiritual fathers demonstrated this in his instruction on repetition of the Jesus Prayer. He said that the prayer must be prayed with the same intensity as one drowning at sea who calls for help(over and over again) with all their might hoping that someone will hear them. Likewise we call out to God focusing all our energy upon the single prayer hoping to seek our own salvation. Unlike someone who is drowning in a sea we know our God is listening. His arms are always reaching down to us ready to pull us into His embrace. It could be said that the repetition that we use in Jesus Prayer is our way to open our arms to God.

The tradition of controlling ones breath in prayer as our fathers have taught is one of the most misrepresented aspects of our Byzantine tradition. Many of us have heard the same things: that "we are borderline Buddhists" or that we have "an exaggerated psychophysical symbolism ". One time I had some one send me some Roman Catholic teachings on prayer after they read some of my posts on Hesychasm. He demanded that I stopped teaching it claiming that the tradition is against the Catholic Church. This understanding often comes from a failure to understand the role of the body and how it is an instrument for our salvation, which is a teaching highly developed in the Byzantine tradition.

Sometimes in the Western spiritual traditions there has been a lack of understanding when it comes to the role of the body in the work of salvation. It is as if in seeking ways to purify the soul the body has been left out. For example, I heard a teaching around thanksgiving many years ago where there was great emphasis on avoiding lustful thoughts and in the same teaching there was a joke about overeating. It was as if the mind was the only thing in need of purification for salvation. In contrast, in the Byzantine spiritual tradition the body's role in salvation has been fully integrated in every aspect of worship. There is not one liturgy where we don't see constant physical work especially in the Great Canon of St. Andrew of Crete, in which there are constant prostrations. 

Many saints of the Byzantine tradition have provided many teachings concerning the body. Among them it could be said that St. Nicodemos of the Holy Mountain was one of the most prolific. Based on his writings not only concerning the body but many other aspects of spirituality the saint continues to be source for spiritual renewal in the churches of the Byzantine tradition. This was even more so in his time where he helped bring about lasting renewal in many areas of the church of his day. In my opinion, he should be named as an essential saint that we should look to for the renewal of our churches in our modern time.

When it comes to the role of the body we find In the teachings of St. Nicodemos an understanding that many of us are not used to. Often we find a tendency to understand the soul as something trapped or contained in a body, which makes the body of little value when it comes to spirituality . Echoing the words of St. John Damascene St. Nicodemos writes," the difference between a rational and irrational soul is this: The irrational soul is led and ruled body the body and the senses, while the rational soul leads and rules the body and the senses (A Hand Book on Spiritual Counsel pg.69).".According to the saint the soul is better understood as containing the body making the body truly at its service. However, because of sin there is a disruption in body's relationship to the soul. The body tends to exist for itself leaving the realm of the soul subject to it. Instead of being an instrument that helps develop our relationship with God the body leads us away from him. 

Understanding the body\soul relationship is essential for understanding Byzantine spirituality. The ascetic disciplines found throughout the Byzantine tradition are for the reconditioning of the body's relationship with soul and in turn God. All too often some of the bodily acts are attributed to being purely symbolic or even psychosomatic. For example, history can attest that there have been at times people in the West who have even accused the Byzantine churches as being those who contemplate their navels, which has been the case concerning the tradition of Hesychasm. However, any bodily action involved in the Byzantine tradition has always been for the ultimate healing of the broken condition that resulted from sin.

For most, some of the bodily disciplines of the Byzantine traditions, such as fasting or prostrations, are easily accepted as ways to develop spiritually. However, there is one aspect of the Byzantine tradition that sometimes is met with reservation, which is controlled breathing that is employed in our prayer tradition of Hesychasm. What is often misunderstood as a psychosomatic technique is really a way to subject the body to the workings of the soul and in turn God. In fact, St. Nicodemos demonstrates great insight in how our relationship with God develops through controlled breathing. He writes," The mind, the activity of the mind, is used from a very early age to be scattered toward the external world. For this reason when you say this sacred prayer(Jesus Prayer) do not breathe continually as is natural to our nature, but hold your breath until your inner consciousness has a chance to say the prayer once. By holding your breath even for this short interval the heart is pressed and troubled and feels pain for not receiving natural oxygen. The mind on the other hand is much more readily controlled to return to the heart, both because of the pain and suffering of the heart but also because of the pleasure that is created from this warm and vivid memory of God" (A Hand Book on Spiritual Counsel pg.160). As the saint demonstrates the controlling of breath that we often employ in praying the Jesus prayer is a way to use the body in order to grow in intimacy with God.

Byzantine spirituality can be physically demanding. However, undergoing the labor leads to a better relationship with God. Not to be confused with purely symbolic acts the bodily actions found in prayer and worship should be properly understood as ways to develop spiritually. Nicodemos and many fathers of Byzantine tradition can attest to this fact. Also, this understanding is essential for understanding the Byzantine tradition of Hesychasm, which would include the breathing disciplines or even bodily postures associated with the Jesus Prayer. Not approaching this from a Byzantine mindset has led to many in our day to believe that we have a practice that's identical to what can be found in non-Christian religions of the East. This understanding could not be farther from the truth. All though they might look the same the discipline behind it has a different goal and even the structure for its use.

(note: controlled breathing takes on various forms, is optional at times, and is not for everyone.)

visit Eastern Catholic Spiritual Renewal

St Andrew Prayer in Anticipation of the Nativity

Hail and blessed be the hour and moment in which the Son of God was born of the most pure Virgin Mary, at midnight, in Bethlehem, in piercing cold. In that hour, vouchsafe, O my God! to hear my prayer and grant my desires, through the merits of Our Saviour Jesus Christ, and of His Blessed Mother. Amen.

Songs for Lent

"Fasting is bright and beautiful," said St Ephrem- long, long ago. So are we fasting in a bright and beautiful way? Or have we been complaining of the sacrifice we have made? or perhaps we have already given up the commitments we have made? As Anne Shirley said- tomorrow is a day with no mistakes in it- so let's dust off our attitudes and do better tomorrow. 

One bit of obvious, unsolicited advice for coffee lovers who are trying to abstain from their favorite beverage--- do you have a headache? Are you being grouchy- not bright and beautiful? Take some Tylenol for the next few days and don't forget to drink your water- you are most likely dehydrated because your default liquid is coffee. Also- the tea "Roastaroma" is a yummy substitute (in my opinion)

Hymns from St Ephrem

Christ, Adam and the Fast
The is the fast of the First Born, the first of his victories.
Let us rejoice in his coming; for in fasting he has overcome.
Though he could have overcome by any means,
He revealed for us the strength hidden in fasting, Overcomer of All.
For by means of it a man can overcome that one who with fruit overcame Adam;
He became greedy and gobbled it. Blessed is the First-Born who encompassed
Our weakness with the wall of his great fasting.

Blessed is the King who adorned the Holy Church with Fasting, Prayer and Vigil.

The Fast Purifies the Eye of the Soul to See God
This is the fast which exalts; which appeared from the First Born
So as to extol the younger ones. There is occasion for delight for the discerning ones in fasting;
When one sees how much he has grown. Fasting secretly purifies the soul
So it can gaze on God and grow by the vision of Him.
For the weight that is from the earth, bends it back to the earth.
Blessed is he who gave us fasts,
The sheer wings by which we fly to him.

Fasting is bright and beautiful for any who bright enough
To gaze on God. The Turbid One, stirred up by anything
Cannot fix the eye on that Clear One. He who possesses a clear eye
He can gaze upon him; as much as it is given to him to gaze.
Instead of the clarifying wine, let us clarify our thought
So that we will be able to see the Clear One
Who overcame the evil one by means of fasting, that disturber of all.

more hymns at 'Your Word to the Wise"