Thursday, July 25, 2013

Why is homeschooling blamed if a kid goes wrong?

If one blames homeschooling for the bad, shouldn't they give homeschooling credit for when things go right? But it doesn't seem to work this way in normal life. Homeschooling gets blamed if a person is socially-awkward. Well, I am still socially awkward and I went through conventional school as all normal people do and public universities. Homeschooling gets blamed if a kid cannot rattle off their multiplication tables in the coffee and doughnut room after church services, but I have yet to see a person demand multiplication tables from a conventionally-schooled child. 
I'm sorry for this 'vent.' It was my intention to write a breezy little missive on some nice educational activities for parents and children, homeschooled or not, but I keep running into comments like this one on a news article about a child at a public school, an article with no mention of schooling alternatives:
"And I applaud them for sending their children to a school rather than homeschooling. The interaction with other children their ages aids in making them well adjusted, helps with social skills, gives them a chance to be children with other children rather than growing up in an adult atmosphere 24/7."
Okay. I see no solution here. Homeschoolers are a minority, and it is usual for minorities of all categories to be disrespected, mistrusted and pushed aside.
I promise promise! Breezy missive coming tomorrow!

8 comments:

  1. Funny...I get the askance-ness because I have my kids in public school. I mean really...I'm giving them to the jaws of Hell every day from September to June right?! :P

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    1. I'm writing a post about that...sort of...stayed tuned!

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    2. Having had my (seven) children in various settings over the years, including a) Montessori, b) Catholic, c) Christian, d) Public and e) Homeschool, I have discovered that this subject is very much like the "working mother" and the "breastfeeding" subjects.

      There is no winning.

      Whatever choice you make, there will be someone who feels threatened by your choice, and cannot control the need to make you feel you are somehow RUINING your child. By having "tried it all" over the years (I have children from 30 down to under a year), people tend to find me completely confusing.

      Frankly, I thought the meanest spirited comments came when I removed my children from the Catholic school to homeschool them, and I know I got an easy ride of it because I work for the church....other families actually got anonymous letters of criticism and admonition!

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    3. Thanks for your comment Annie- another wrench in the works- the cost of schooling choices (except public)- I don't know anyone with more than 3 children who have their kids in Catholic school

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  2. All of this defensiveness (?) you homeschooling bloggers have about homeschooling makes no sense to me :). I don't know if it's the community I was raised in (?) but no one ever looked down on homeschoolers. I honestly have heard more attacks on homeschooling relayed by you than I have ever heard on my own. I know many, many homeschooled kids who are fine and more than fine. Some of them joined us when high school rolled around, and they were quickly embraced by the group. They all got into good colleges. I would never homeschool my children(maybe I should write a post!), but kudos to those who want to, can, and do! There are as many ways to educate, as to parent. So many options! Everyone just picks what works for them--right?

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    1. I agree with your last sentence...and I'm sorry that these posts have been 'vents'. I just keep coming head to head with some really negative people- maybe because it is summer and people hope I'll enroll my children in public school? Anyways- If you read every word of these posts, I come to the same conclusion as you- we try to do what is best for our children!

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    2. I think homeschooling is more and more acceptable, even among Catholics....so random people won't be so critical. The people who struggle to keep their children in Catholic school, both financially and often logistically (since the parish school is much more difficult to get their children to than the neighborhood) makes them automatically defensive. And, if someone chooses something else, it implies that there is a BETTER choice than theirs. The idea of "what works for them" or what an individual child NEEDS, can be lost in the shuffle.

      I had to remove my youngest school-aged child from the parish school, and put him in a small Christian school with individualized teaching, due to some learning disabilities. When I tell people I had to hold him back a year, no one has any issues at all because people can so readily see and understand the "individual child's needs" part of it. Usually that isn't so easy for people to see.

      Also, frankly, the prouder people are, and the more hype they infuse into their choice, the more defensive people get. I always try to take the low road on that...

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    3. Annie- exactly...and maybe in general I personally think homeschooling is better for kids in a stable, decently literate household, but I am still not going to make specific judgments about others. That is just mean.

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