chaplain versus 'chaplain'

"Whatever your personal beliefs, let us use this time to celebrate life and remember that we don't know how long we have on earth. 'John' was a loving husband, a wonderful father. This grave now symbolizes life. And we remember with fondness 'John's' life. God, be a comfort to his family. Let us all have a moment of silence.....Now- let us hear some personal remembrances about 'John.' "

The hospice chaplain prayed these words; nothing about God's judgment and mercy, nothing about Jesus,  really not much of substance. Her entire presentation seemed to rest on the fact that she was desperately trying to not offend anyone. I surmised that 'John' and his family wanted a very secular graveside service and that this is what he wanted. I am not about to 'argue' with the departed. But after the eulogies, a sister in full habit walked up to the microphone and started the rite of committal. Any priest parts were missing, but the rich language of mercy, forgiveness, and heaven were there. This sister was part of the nursing team that made home visits to 'John' for a year. I marveled at her courage in the face of secularism, but then a friend alluded that 'John' had (perhaps) converted with the help of the sisters. Chaplains will meet patients 'where they are.' Making converts in a hospital and hospice setting isn't what professional chaplaincy is about- but the hospice chaplain should have met 'John' where he is now- with a true Christian service. But she was too concerned about offending the Buddhists and New Agers and others.So I was relieved to hear Sister pray.

I love the richness of the following prayers of committal:

Lord Jesus Christ,
by your own three days in the tomb,
you hallowed the graves of all who believe in you
and so made the grave a sign of hope
that promises resurrection
even as it claims our mortal bodies.
Grant that our brother may sleep here in peace
until you awaken him to glory
for you are the resurrection and the life.

Because God has chosen to call our brother from this life to Himself,
we commit his body to the earth,
for we are dust and onto dust we shall return.
But the Lord Jesus will change our mortal bodies to be like His in glory,
for He is risen, the firstborn of the dead.
So let us commend our brother to the Lord,
that the Lord may embrace him in peace and raise up his body on the last day.

Eternal Memory

I'll be taking the kids to a graveside service of a homeschooling dad of three children in a few hours. We know his kids and their mother but not him. Although he, suffering from cancer, had been cared for at home for the past year by sisters whose ministry is to perform home health care, they are not a religious family. There will be no church service. We have never been close to death where God and heaven and the 'last things' weren't the focus of discussion and comfort. So, there's not much to say...but personally, I find a lot of comfort and hope in the following words:

Thou only Creator Who with wisdom profound mercifully orders all things, and gives to all that which is useful, give rest, 0 Lord, to the soul of Thy servant who has fallen asleep, for he has placed his trust in Thee, our Maker and Fashioner and our God (Troparion).

With the saints give rest, 0 Christ, to the soul of Thy servant where sickness and sorrow are no more, neither sighing, but life everlasting (Kontakion).

What earthly sweetness remains unmixed with grief? What glory stands immutable on the earth? All things are but feeble shadows, all things are most deluding dreams, yet one moment only, and death shall supplant them all. But in the light of Thy countenance, 0 Christ, and in the sweetness of Thy beauty, give rest to him whom Thou hast chosen, for as much as Thou loves mankind.

I weep and lament when I think upon death, and behold our beauty created in the likeness of God lying in the tomb disfigured, bereft of glory and form. 0 the marvel of it! What is this mystery concerning us? Why have we been delivered to corruption? Why have we been wedded unto death? Truly, as it is written, by the command of God Who gives the departed rest (Funeral Hymns from St John of Damascus)

A Daybook for April

Outside my window... our cat, again (townhouse landscapes are pretty quotidian)

I am thinking...  about plans for the summer- part-time teaching, ballet intensives,  maybe a homeschooling conference, visiting family, a Great American Roadtrip (?)

I am thankful for... my husband who has taken over night duty for the baby since I have been coughing. 

From the kitchen... mac and cheese with tuna and peas- very 1950's!

I am wearing... pants!

I am creating... tiered skirts in pink checked cotton for all the girl cousins; trying to get done by Easter, but maybe Pentecost is looking more doable 

I am going... to try to write a few posts that require more theology. I always shy away from the complicated. I am more practical, but sometimes solid apologetics is required.

I am reading... The Wise Woman and Other Stories by George MacDonald; then, I'll pass it on to my big girls. I bought it for them

I am hoping... to get over this cough- the last time I had a bad cough, it took me three months to recover. I have a doctor's appointment in a few days...

I am hearing... my girls practice reading aloud from an old country book.

Around the house... I am trying to do Spring cleaning and not really succeeding.
 

One of my favorite things... is hummus and pita bread chips and a sliced tomato with Lawry's seasoned salt and black pepper.

A few plans for the rest of the week: Prepare for Monday when I am substitute teaching 4 evenings a week at the college (I haven't been teaching since January- it is a short and boring story)

more daybooks can be found at the simple woman's daybook

cough cough cough

another replay...I promise something new for tomorrow!

An Outsider's View of a Typical Catholic Parish

The big girls and I went to Sunday Mass at the closest Western-rite church this weekend because of all the Nutcracker craziness. I always feel unsettled when I go to a church that isn't 'mine;' I don't belong. Perhaps visitors to our missions also feel this way...

Humility- I whisper to myself. I always feel like people are looking at me, sympathetic that I am going to Mass alone with four children. I bet they imagine my husband is reading the Sunday paper in bed. I want to shout- my husband actually left early to replace the ill priest for a different community. He'll celebrate their Liturgy and then our mission's Liturgy until the priest is better. With God's mercy, the ill priest will be better before Christmas.

We frequently go to Mass at the hospital, but that is a speedy daily Mass and the chapel has no kneelers, so the Mass itself is as simple as it gets. A Sunday Mass is different. I always forget that we aren't supposed to kneel after receiving the Eucharist, so I stay kneeling. I worry that I am distracting the believers with my 'backwards' sign of the cross. I hope that everyone has the eyes on their own work. My girls are shocked when altar girls come up the aisle and admonish them to stop judging- even though I disagree with the concept of altar girls. My girls are doubly shocked to see a girl friend who used to faithfully attend the Byzantine Liturgy being an altar server at this church. They left our mission when my husband allowed the people to sing the old country anthem on a holiday during coffee and donuts; they insisted my husband was a liberal. 

This parish has three priests and two deacons. They do a lot of good works and have lots of  groups involved in the pro-life movement. All of their Sunday Masses are packed. I am sure that some of my misgivings are simply sins of jealousy that I need to confess- to one of the priests at this parish since I don't confess to my husband. I am jealous that we are so small and that people who identify themselves as Byzantine Catholic have never even visited us. 

The parish has the trappings of a modern church- clapping after the kids' choir rendition of "Soon and Very Soon" is finished, girl altar servers, lay people opening the tabernacle and distributing the Eucharist (the Blood being poured by a lay person from the priest's chalice into clear glass goblets), and a children's liturgy where they take the children out during the Liturgy of the Word. These things are disturbing to me.

But the lay reader was reverent during the readings, and the homily was dynamic, yet a hard-core teaching directly related to the Gospel. The tabernacle is in the center, and there is a beautiful crucifix as a focal point in the modern construction. There are normal confessionals and there are Knights of Columbus as ushers that also stay close to the Eucharist distributors to eliminate desecration. 

It was a bit discombobulating, but God was there and we were blessed to be there.

coughing makes bad posting

...so here's a replay from I forget when...

Bill Clinton is Right

Former U.S. President Bill Clinton was right when he stated this past week  at a UCLA rally, "When we care about something in America that's really important to us, like football, we know the facts." Of course, he was speaking about politics skewed to his particular leanings. I'd like to explore the meaning of his quotation from a different standpoint.

Is spirituality important to us? Is religion important to us? Is the Catholic faith important to us? Is God important to us? Do we know the facts?

Are Moses and Jesus contemporaries, or do they come from different eras? Why are we constantly crossing ourselves in church? Why do we stand up for a blessing? What does the Church teach about artificial birth control and why? What is the difference between discipline and dogma,  between small 't' tradition and big 'T' Tradition?

Starbucks CEO Howard Schultz told the New York Times that he wants Starbucks to become a “third place” in people's lives. People have home, work and then a coffee house or bar as the three places that they focus most of their life's activities.

I'd like to think that we humans can handle a bit more than three important places in our lives. Perhaps a life is like a stove with  four burners. Two burners are in the front for top priorities, and two are in the back for important aspects of life that get less play day to day. I contend that for every believer, the Church should be on one of those burners. How can we be sure that God and the Church are priorities in our lives? 

Random Practical Ideas- Some from Mom and Dad

• Go to church on Sundays and feast days. Discuss the Gospel and the homily with family over coffee and donuts. Many Catholics are hit and miss on Sundays- let's start there.
• Don't shop on Sundays. Make the Sabbath day holy by going to Mass and then spending time with family at home, the park or somewhere besides the 'cathedral of conspicuous consumption.' This might seem impossible, but in most of Europe (edit: in small towns), shops close early Friday and don't open again until Monday. Everyone prepares ahead of time for the weekend. 
• Listen to only classical or Christian music on Sundays. My parents insisted on this during my childhood. It really helps set the day apart from the rest of the week.
• Say grace before eating a meal- even in a restaurant!  
• Educate yourself about God and the Church through the Bible and other books. Watch religious videos occasionally.  Catholic school is not necessarily the best way to do this (sorry Mom and Dad- sometimes I think you wasted your hard earned money....but that's another post).
• Print an easy morning and evening prayer card, place it on your bedside table, and say a prayer when you go to sleep and wake up. Nightmares averted!
• Subscribe to a good Catholic magazine and buy The Catechism of the Catholic Church. Place both in the bathroom. Eventually, everyone will read these and learn!
• Go meatless every Friday. Why not? Many people are vegans every day of the year. It is such a beautiful reminder of Jesus' sacrifice. And there is something a little bit....gross...about eating meat when we are remembering Jesus' death on the cross.
• Get some holy water and use it.  Sprinkle it on squabbling siblings if you are so inclined (thanks, Mom).
• Decide if you and your family are going to make God and church a priority. There is only so much time in the day.  Church needs to be on one of the four burners to be a priority.  --- What if the marriage is mixed? Hopefully, the kids can go to church with you. Then, come home and build a nice family atmosphere. Still refrain from shopping and try to have a sabbath.  Have a popcorn and DVD afternoon together when you get back from church on Sunday. Ask your non-Catholic spouse to participate in some 'corporal works of mercy activities' with the family- mow the lawn of an older neighbor, collect food for the food bank,  write letters to our servicemen overseas. The talents of your family will determine activities that will be interesting and meaningful to you.

 So- Clinton was right in saying that we make things a priority if it is important to us. It would be a shame if we know more about the latest celebrity scandal or sports stats instead of our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ and His Catholic Church.